on my mind

i did it.
i cut my hair.
so far i like it.
it's all bouncy and swingy
and takes a lot less shampoo.

*****

as i mentioned last week

i've been trying to figure out my next step.

i've decided that after graduation

i am going to pursue a masters degree

(and maybe a phd?

i can't think of that yet!!)

probably in history

but i'm keeping my mind open as yet.

this decision has been the source of 

a lot 

of anxiety over the past few weeks

it's still a ways off, 

but there's still a lot of planning to be done.

making sure i can fulfill all the requirements

(must brush up-

and by brush up i mean re-learn -

french and latin)

taking the gre

picking a school

etc.

i'm still feeling a lot of anxiety

and overwhelmed,

but i know it's the right thing.

*****

and now
for the most devastating turn of events

i have been called as a seminary teacher.

i cried most of sunday afternoon
and broke out in hives.

this will probably become normal behavior for me.

i have NO IDEA
how i will accomplish
working 35 hours a week
taking three classes
and teaching seminary.

no idea.